Brotherly Love

Within a week of finding out he was going to be a big brother, (a) was pretty excited about the pending arrival of “his” baby.  We tried to prepare him as much as possible for what it would be like to have a baby at our house, helping him cope with the idea that this baby could not play or talk back to him at first, for the reality that it was going to be a brother when he originally wanted a sister, for the fact that Mommy and Daddy would have to stay at the hospital for a few nights, and I still had concern in my heart about how he would handle having to share his favorite people.  What I was not prepared for was just how precious brotherly love would be at our house. 

From the very first moment (a) met (b) he was totally in love.  He beamed from ear to ear as his first declaration was “There’s our cutie baby!!!” Within two minutes of that meeting he begged, “Oh Momma, can we keep him!!???” (Which pulled at the heartstrings of everyone in the room including the nurse!)  Even now, 8 weeks in, he still asks almost daily if we can keep his baby brother.  The answer is still definitely YES.  I was afraid the new would wear off as the reality of crying and spit up and dirty diapers set it, but to my surprise, he is still completely in love with “that cutie baby.” He wants to help with him in any way he can, he talks sweetly to him, he gives him infinite hugs and kisses, sings songs to help make him feel better if he cries, and shares with him all stories of excitement and adventure he can think of.  He wants us to take (b) with us everywhere he goes and when they do need to be apart it takes 472 kisses to get (a) to finally part with him.   

Photo credit: La Di Da Photography LLC

Watching all of this on a daily basis makes my Momma heart melt into a million pieces.  I know it most likely won’t last forever, but I am going to enjoy every second of it while it does.  As I have watched the relationship with these two blossom I pray that I know what is ahead… having grown up with a couple of pretty awesome sisters myself, I know there will be days they will want to slug each other, but I hope they will also always be the first to jump in and help each other.  I know they will get frustrated beyond words, but if anyone else does they will be the first one to defend each other.  I hope they will cling to each other through the lows and cheer for each other in the victories.  (And I can’t lie, I hope they will take great care of (A) and me when we are old!)

Photo Credit: La Di Da Photography LLC

This brotherly love has also shown up in some of my devotions lately- and it has made me think how thankfully I am for that “brotherly love” within my faith family as well.  That I have friends who I know will help any way they can, will speak encouragement into my life when I need it, make me “feel better” when I cry, that we can share our joys and excitement with, that we may get frustrated with each other but are also the first to defend the other, and that we can cling to each other in the lows and cheer for each other in the victories.  I am so thankful that God set his people up to function as a family, because that brotherly love is a bond that is not easily broken.  It is stronger than time and distance, it is forged for life, and it is a gift from God himself.

“Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.  Honor one another above yourselves.” Romans 12:10

Without Distractions

Over the weekend, we had the privilege of attending a wedding back home in Indiana.  This wedding gave us the opportunity to take a little trip down memory lane.  It was held in the chapel of the church camp where (A) and I grew up.  This was also the camp where we met as teenagers, became friends, and eventually started “falling” for each other.  As the wedding music began, we sat side by side on the bench, a little boy in each of our arms.  I couldn’t help but smile as I remembered how we often sat side by side on those benches during evening worship those weeks of camp nearly 20 years ago.  I looked across the aisle and saw our friend, John, who we have known for many, many years.  John was the dean the week of camp when our siblings and friends conspired to try to get us to start dating- John was somewhat in on the conspiracy.  As the bridal party continued to come down the aisle, John caught my eye.  He was looking at our family with a knowing smile, and I could tell he was remembering us as teenagers also.

Our family back at camp so many years later... distractions and all :-)

On the late night drive back to Illinois, we discussed how the afternoon had brought back a flood of memories- but the most prominent one in my mind was the thought of what it was like to be in love with so few distractions.  Back then we weren’t worried about careers or household finances, we weren’t sleep deprived, our schedules weren’t packed with responsibilities, and we weren’t throwing our hearts and energy into parenting.  In the beginning planning a date night was as simple as checking the schedules on our part time jobs.  We really could sit and talk for hours because no one else was screaming for our attention or begging to be fed.  The future was something we only dreamed about, we had no idea what it would actually hold.  As (A) and I reminisced, we agreed that we wouldn’t want to trade the beautiful life we have built to go back to those simple times, but it sure is precious (and truthfully- healthy for our marriage) to remember what things were like before the distractions- what first made us fall for each other and what we built our relationship on in the very beginning. 

During my Sunday School class the next morning, the topic of distraction came back up as we discussed it was one of the greatest tools the devil uses against our marriages- how we many not stand in opposition of our husband but we easily become distracted by our busy lives and how it can cause our marriage to suffer.  But as I have thought about that further, I realize it is not just my marriage that can be a victim of distraction…. It is also my quiet time, as my house is rarely quiet… it is my role as mom when I take a look at all the things I need to do around the house… often lesson planning and grading distract me from loving my students as I should… the busyness of my own life distracts me from being the friend I should be. 

Distraction is dangerous because it is sneaky.  It is filled with GOOD things, but sometimes those good things, keep us from the BEST thing.  I pray that my eyes would be open to notice distraction when it tries to take over.  While all the “things” in my life do have to be taken care of, I don’t want to miss the forest for the trees.  I’m thankful that memory lane often takes me straight into the forest- and the memories take me to the heart of what I need to focus on the most… relationships.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us” Hebrews 12:1 

Whole Hearted Messes

Today was a 4-loads-of-laundry day.  I realize in some homes that is totally the norm every day, but I am the kind of girl who wants to get the most “bang for her buck” when it comes to detergent and electricity (ok, or maybe I just hate folding it), but in our house a 4 load day is a big deal.  I shouldn’t be surprised… we have a 6 week old (seriously… how did 6 weeks go by so fast!) who is an expert a spitting up on everything- hence a load of his clothes and a load of mine, a three year old who plays as hard as he can all the time until he is covered head to toe in sweat and dirt and grime, and overall we lead a pretty active life which tends to lead to more laundry.

Bouncy houses = one VERY dirty boy!!

As I made multiple trips in and out of the laundry room today, I couldn’t help but smile as I looked at one of the little plaques that sits in there.  I bought it at a home décor sale years ago because I absolutely loved what it said… “The most memorable days end with the dirtiest clothes.”  It’s so often true!  I think about the most memorable days from my years growing up… many of those “most memorable days” were in the cattle barn, and I was FILTHY from hard work but my heart was full from the rewards of that work.  As I watch (a), so many of our “most memorable days” mean sweat and sticky and lots of dirt because he plays hard and has fun doing it.  Some of the dirties clothes I have washed for (A) involved dares or challenges he took from kids in ministry- whether it was a pie to the face for reaching a VBS goal or cracking an egg on his head in the church camp cafeteria, he is always willing to get dirty to make memories bonding with students.  Right now (b) manages to get his clothes dirty within about 3.2 seconds of me getting them on him… and these days are so memorable as I watch that precious little boy growing right before my eyes.  It’s true- memorable days end in dirty clothes. 

I think that phrase is true, at least in our home, because you aren’t afraid to get dirty when you are doing something with your whole heart.  When heart is involved, I just spray on a little extra Oxi-Clean and smile as I think about the memory that made the mess.  And I think it is true figuratively too… you aren’t afraid to get a little “messy” with extra time or effort or financial support when you are working at something with your whole heart.   

When you love people with your whole heart it is messy because you risk getting your feelings hurt.  When you do ministry with your whole heart it is messy because people carry around a lot of baggage before they hand it to Jesus.  When you care for your family with your whole heart it is messy because some times they let you down or leave you carrying a lot of the weight.  When you lead with your whole heart it is messy because you feel like you are never enough.

But I wouldn’t trade the “messy” days for anything because that is where the memories are made.  That is where the learning happens, the sacrifices are made, the lives are changed, the whole heart is invested.  After all, as Kingdom Workers that is how we are called to live… “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as if working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward.  It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Col. 3:23

Praying for that Classroom

For the last two days my social media feeds have been flooded with “First Day of School” pictures- both from the perspective of parents and teachers.  My students don’t return until next week, and I will still be home on maternity leave for a few more weeks, but I am still spending the majority of my time at school this week getting things ready for my substitute (God bless my friend, Judy, for stepping in!!).

As I look at the pictures of kids I have watched grow, and see the classrooms of friends I dearly love I think about all this year will hold.  All I can do is hope that I’m not the only one praying over that classroom.  Praying over the classroom because while I am a teacher, I’m still a person too.  I’m worried about meeting all the needs of every child in that room because I know that no matter how hard I try I will feel like it wasn’t enough.  I am a person and it hurts when outsiders complain about teachers or parents question how much I care or the approach I am taking.  I hear all the outside “noise” about “why aren’t schools teaching this or that…” and trust me some days I wonder too, but I have to follow the standards the state has set out for me.  I am a teacher, but I am also a person so I struggle with stress, am overwhelmed with joy, and wonder about the future… often all three within the same hour in my classroom.  I am a teacher, but I am also a mom who is worried about my own babies at child care while I work.  I am a teacher, but I am also a wife and friend trying to juggle relationships outside of the classroom.  I am a teacher, but I am also a Kingdom Worker so I am spending every day trying to show my students the love of Jesus in the best way I can for a public school classroom. 

I am praying for that classroom because it is filled with students.  And while they are students, they are also children- some who are missing parents because they have spent the entire summer together, some who are missing parents because their parents are absent from their lives.  They are students, but  they are also siblings who are distracted today because they had a fight with brother or sister this morning or are wondering what their best friend sibling is doing down the hall in another classroom.  They are students, but they are also athletes tired from practice or worried about their game that evening.  They are students, but they are also friends who are learning about the social interactions of their adolescent years where one moment you are besties and the next you are “frienemies”. 

I am praying for that classroom because I know the year will bring a roller coaster of “life” through the homes of everyone in that room.  I am praying for that classroom because I know the kinds of events that we will watch on the evening news and ask God to protect our community from experiencing the same turmoil.  I am praying for that classroom because I know that prayer is the most powerful thing I can do for the lives that walk through my door every day, and it is the only way to help keep peace in my heart and mind as I face a new school year.

Will you join me in praying for “that” classroom?  Mine, but also “that” classroom your child, grandchild, teacher friend, or even random stranger is stepping back into for the start of a new year.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6