Help!

At dinner tonight, we were having a laugh at how many “adult” phrases (a) has picked up from us.  He will often jabber something to us followed by “Ok!?” which I know he has learned from me when I stop and listen to myself give him directions. The other night he was talking to me as I was trying to do something else at the same time and he very gently took my chin and turned my face toward him and said “listen to me”- a phrase and motion his daddy uses with him.  He is always repeating things to the dogs that he has heard us say like “Stay on your blanket!” and “Come here!” paired with patting a hand to the leg as he calls.  We have realized that we have to be pretty careful what we say around him, because it will often pop back into conversation at some point later!

One of my favorite phrases to hear from him though is “Please, help me!” And I can’t lie, sometimes I really enjoy it because he has gotten himself into some situation that is somewhat hilarious and that is why he is in need of help.  But other times he just needs to reach something or do something that he cannot do on his own.  And I love helping him!  I love knowing that he trusts me enough to ask me for help, and I love the trust that he knows I will do my best to come through for him.  I will admit though, I don’t think “Please, help me!” is a phrase he has picked up from me.  I am terrible about asking for help. 

Yep! He is TOTALLY my kid! Falling backwards into a box is a definite possibility where you might actually hear me calling "Help!" (Yes, I did help him... after I got my picture)

I love to be a “giver” of help!  It brings me joy to do things for others or come alongside them in some way.  But, I am stubborn, strong-willed, and pretty self-reliant.  That stubborn tenacity is both a blessing and a curse.  While it has gotten me through a lot of tough situations, it also bites me in the tail sometimes because it makes we a terrible “receiver” of help.

I am slowly learning the power of the statement, “Please, help me!”  One lesson God has been teaching me is that there is no shame in asking for help when you need it.  In the last few months, (A) has not had the same end-of-the-day flexibility we were used to for many years.  He used to have the ability to adjust his work hours to be done by 5 or so and pick up (a) from daycare if I had some place to be or errands to take care of.  He was able to go in a little later or take (a) along with him to work for a little while if he was sick and we were running our alternate childcare plan.  Right now, he no longer has that kind of flexibility, and does not get off work until after childcare has already closed.  I know that is a very petty thing and is the “normal” for many people we know, but it has forced me (the self-reliant one) to have to reach out and ask for help on days when I just can’t logistically make it all happen.  And do you know what I have found? People are willing to help, and often even glad I asked (or at least they tell me they are haha). 

I have always been stubborn about my mental and emotional management as well.  I want to be in control and “tough” but life has a way of taking its toll.  After nursing a battered heart for a while, I finally realized, it is ok to ask for help.  And the first line of help, brought in a second line of help.  And do you know what I’ve found?  People are willing to help!  And I am becoming glad I asked for help.

There have been some other ways help has come into our lives over the past several months, and sometimes that has been very humbling.  It has been hard to accept help sometimes, but I remind myself of the JOY it brings me to be a help “giver,” and so I have been a help “receiver” because I do not want to take the joy of that opportunity from someone else.

The Bible is full of accounts where God’s people call on Him for help and He stepped in to intercede for them.  He fed manna when they were hungry, he fought many battles for his people, he showed his power in impossible looking situations.  Jesus helped so many who were in need of physical healing, and gave the opportunity for spiritual healing to anyone who chooses Him as their Savior.  From reading those many accounts in His Word, it brings me back to my feelings on helping (a).  I believe God wants to help us, and He wants us to trust Him enough to ASK for His help.  I admit, it is still hard for me to ask for Him for help sometimes- but do you know what I’ve found?  He is willing to help, and He is glad when I ask!  And He loves me so much that sometimes he sends help even before I ask. 

“You make your saving help my shield, and your right hand sustains me; your help has made me great.” Psalm 18:35

“We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield.” Psalm 33:20

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1

“God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day.” Psalm 46:5