Running

 In the spring of 2017, I took up running.  If you were a reader back then you may remember my story of feeling like God was specifically telling me to do this, even though I felt like it was a crazy thing to be “called” to do.  Little did I know what the next year and a half of my life would look like.  While I was never an amazing runner and never earned any awards, running got me through a LOT of hard days.  It was a great way to expend frustration, anger, pain, sadness, anxiety, and emotional weariness- to just go pound it out on the pavement.  Some days I even had a good cry as I ran, and by the time I was done I always felt at least a little bit better about myself and my life. 

(A), (a), and me after completing our first 5K in the summer of 2017

 Half way through my pregnancy with (b) I stopped running as it was really making my back hurt at that stage of the game.  Unfortunately, with two littles it became almost impossible to find time to go run and I have had not yet had the opportunity to take it back up.  Now with three I find myself running in a lot of ways, but none of them are down the road (by choice).  I am often running late or running down the hall after (b) who is usually wielding a toilet brush or plunger.  I am running low on patience, running on emotional fumes, running to grab a spit-up rag, or running a plan by my mom or my husband. 

 

I miss running for exercise, I miss running for my mental health.  I miss running after my passions, I miss running in-and-out of anyplace QUICKLY.  Running taught me endurance, it taught me I was tougher and stronger than I thought, running gave me discipline, and running taught me I was capable of things I never dreamed I could (or would want to) do.

 

I very much hope I am able to run again some day (maybe even sooner rather than later), but for today as “running” looks very different, I will remember even in this crazy kind of running- the lessons God taught me still hold true.  With His help, I am tougher and stronger than I think, and in His grace I am capable of doing things I didn’t think I could do.  And with that in mind… I will just keep running.

 

“I run in the path of your commands, for you have broadened my understanding.” Psalms 119:32